Breaking News! One Monkey Typing Publishing Company is Denied Financial Assistance!

Tax Increment Financing(TIF) Voted Down by City of Westwood

One Monkey Typing Corporate Headquarters

Sources close to the city council of Westwood, Kansas, have shared information with Dane Zeller, editor-in-chief of One Monkey Typing that his application for tax increment financing has been denied. Wishing to remain anonymous, the source described the vote as “not even close”, and accompanied by peals of laughter.

Attempts to get comments from Dane Zeller, editor-in-chief of the company, failed. However, sources close to the enterprising young publisher report hearing this response: “the mayor and his selected council member/developers

Westwood TIF Tower

have been very discriminating in the use of our city’s funds. What’s okay for the owner of the country club is not okay for the arts. If the mayor thinks we’re through with this, he can kiss my ass.”

The mayor did not respond to Zeller’s comment, but a former official with the city would not deny that the mayor said, “Tax increment financing is for legitimate friends of the city, not a tiny jack-leg publisher who wants to fix up his garage.”

In comments made by the receptionist at One Monkey Typing Publishing, Rhonda Coots, explained that One Monkey Typing publishes books, essays, short stories, and is planning on starting a city newspaper in Westwood, with an editorial on the front page of its first edition, above the fold. Ms. Coots admitted that Mr. Zeller, although an immensely creative man, was not good at spelling, having to ask Ms. Coots how to spell the word “ass-hole.”

#TifCorpWelfare #OneMonkeyTyping #RhondaCoots

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