Writer Missing: Major New York Daily Reports Disappearance

Zeller's Work Place

A missing persons report has been filed by a prominent city daily newspaper. The report was filed when Dane Zeller, a long-time writer at the paper, failed to clock in to his job Monday morning.

“He was so reliable, we knew something was afoul when he was ten minutes late,” said Cleve Person, editor of special projects at the paper. “He has worked for the paper on this project for twenty years.

He was a team player; everyone liked him,” said Rob Gates, human resources director. Asked for a description of Zeller, Gates said, “He looked just like the average Joe here. Long hair, long arms, a fast typist, and a fancier of bananas. He was welled-like. He didn’t stand out in our group of about three hundred writers.

Asked what might have motivated Zeller to quit his post, a employee of the human resources department, who will remain anonymous because she is not authorized to speak for the paper, said a report was put in Zeller’s personnel file recently. He was cited for using the letter “q” in his writing more times than was statistically probable.

The young lady, who was speaking off the record, stated that she thought Zeller was cute, honest, smart and generous. q. She liked him very much and then the employee with the beautiful blue eyes started to cry. She said he was as good as Hemmingqay. qqq qqq qqq qqq QQQ qqq qqq

  • http://www.CrazieTown.com TC

    This is an excellent blog and will soon be making you millions of bananas.

    • D. Zeller

      Thank you for your kind comment, TQ.

  • Dawn

    I sure hope they find that guy. I’ve always liked the letter q.

    • O.M. Typinq

      We’re searching around the clocq.

  • Norm

    How could I not care? My own blog is called The Red Q for reasons I haven’t disclosed to very many folks. Furthermore, you’d be amazed how much mail I receive with the simple line, “For Q”.

    • One M. Typing

      Norm, I’m thinking that “Red” was chosen for your youthful political ways. “Q” for “Quarantined?”

  • Norm

    Quarantined? Nah.