The Lord Giveth; Let Him Take it Away

Another insidious practice alert by Dane Zeller: shoveling snow.

There, a few more things out of my garage and I’ll be able to park my car inside this winter. You may think I’ve been hasty in my decision to throw away my snow shovel. Not so. God drops snow on all of my neighborhood. He covers my lawn, the branches of my trees, the leaves I didn’t rake this Fall and the driveway leading to my garage.

Cleaning Out the Garage of Unnecessary Tools


Rest assured, what god provides, he removes…with sunlight. I need no shovel to assist in this natural process. Any snow removal that I perform will be by driving my SUV over it in my driveway and mashing it to a manageable thickness. It requires no dangerous winter exercise to do this; it’s just a byproduct of the comings and goings of our family.

Those of you who need wide swaths of snow removed from their driveway can simply drive up and down the pavement several times at different angles. Job done.

By the way, the neighbors will no longer complain about the leaves I left on the lawn this Fall. Such is the joy of a blanket of snow.

  • Nangagutza

    Doing less is doing more…

    • http://www.danezeller.com Dane Zeller

      Oh wise one, Nangagutza, in a nutshell.

  • Mike Lance

    Let others point to sloth, but i consider it a thoughtfully considered decision. Of course, what do I know? My RV is parked in San Diego as I type this. Snow? Something one visits if they want to slide down on barrel staves.

    • http://www.danezeller.com Dane Zeller

      Mike, thank you for correctly stating my reason for my snow shoveling alert. Your selection of living quarters suggests to me that buying my brick house on the corner has lead to some really questionable practices. You don’t drive your car into the garage each night in order to preserve its finish and keep it safe. That’s because…what?…you don’t have a garage! A lawn. A driveway. And no interminable hours spent piddling around your workshop in the basement! Damn, you must have lots of time on your hands.